4 Lessons Dating has Taught Me about Attracting Clients
At the risk of getting a bit vulnerable here, after swearing off men for a while after my last breakup, I started a quest for love a little over a year ago.
As any good personal development junkie would do, I hired a Love Coach to help me in my quest, and I’ll be honest, I didn’t know what I was getting myself into.
I was hooked in to the investment by the promise of getting my man, the only thing I thought I wanted, but I was actually given everything I really needed along the way (inner work) to make it happen.
During this year, I also left my corporate job of almost 7 years to pursue being a full time entrepreneur. After 50+ dates and 50+ sales calls, let’s just say I started to see some parallels between dating and attracting clients and I’m going to share those with you today.
1. Get out of your own way.
When I first started dating, I had my “list” - you know, that infamous list a mile long of all the things I just had to have in my man - from what kind of college they should have gone to, to what kind of job they needed to have.
Now, I’m not saying don’t have standards or go on a date any joe shmoe that swipes right on you, BUT I found that the list can all to easily become an excuse to cancel on a guy who seems great in many ways but just doesn’t have that one thing you had your heart set on.
In my business life, I’d get in my own way too. For example, I’d often lament to my biz besties that I wasn’t getting any sales calls. I once went nearly 4 weeks without any sales calls - ouch!
Then I looked back at my marketing…. I had somehow managed to send out and post that month with only 1 call to action to book a call… no wonder I didn’t have calls!! I was in my own way.
2. It’s a JOURNEY, not a destination.
I once thought if I had a boyfriend all my worries and woes would be solved. After that second or third break up I started to see that entering a relationship is not a final destination. You need to take some actions to get into that relationship, and you also need to take some actions for it to flourish.
In business, we are in a similar journey. Sometimes we think hitting that goal, like a $10K month, is the ticket to success and we work our little booty off to get it. However, once we are there it’s very unlikely we’ll feel like we “arrived.” In fact, we’ll probably have a different and bigger goal, and that’s ok. It’s all part of the journey.
3. Courtship is still a thing.
In the dating world, it’s easy to jump the gun quickly. All too many times I’d have a great dating app exchange or first date with someone and I’d future trip to our life and inevitable marriage right away only to be left with them ghosting me.
Would you marry someone you just met? Probably not right? So why think that your new prospect would spend 4 or 5 figures with you after getting a 5 email sequence. Don’t let your mind run away with you over it. Just realize it may take time and multiple follow-ups with someone before they seal the deal, and that’s completely normal.
4. Focus on the GROWTH.
This is the big one! If you get anything from this article make it this. In order to thrive in any pursuit whether it’s dating or business, you need to focus on the growth vs the outcome.
For example, take that $10K/month goal. If you miss it month after month and all you’re focusing on is how you aren’t getting the outcome ($10K in a month) then you will feel like crap. However, if you focus on the growth you are getting along the way, the whole flavor changes.
You’re able to have gratitude for the 50 people you added to your email list, or the sales call you got one step closer to closing versus beating yourself up over not getting to $10K. Gratitude is a much better look on you than disappointment. Promise! xo